Ava Jade: From Hawaii to South Korea

Leaving in 2 days!!!!! I don’t know what to say to end this. I can’t believe it has been a year. I just feel so blessed and thankful to have this opportunity and I will remember this experience forever. I have met a lot of great people and learned a lot about myself along the way. I feel extremely accomplished in the sense that I can succeed at whatever I put my heart and mind to. About a year ago, I set my heart on Korea and I did it.

I’m really not sure what’s next or what the future will hold for me. But, I’m perfectly all right with that. I have figured out that I will never have everything figured out. It’s cool though…life is much more exciting this way.

I can’t even bring myself to write about the things I will miss about Korea. There are simply too many. Korea has been good to me, and just about every single Korean person (or person in general) I have crossed paths with has been helpful and kind. I really do love Korea and the experience she (he?, it?) has brought to me.

Thank you to all the hearts and souls I have come across this year.

Ava

I just can’t express how incredibly grateful I am for everything and everyone. With 21 days left in Korea, I’m really feeling it. I’m super excited to go home and figure out the next challenge…continue this journey. I have missed Jay all year long, but (perhaps with the onset of volleyball season am really missing my twin sis right now. I can’t believe it’s been a year, and my heart smiles when I think of all the people who have helped me this year. Thank you.

But I’m also going to miss very special friends I’ve made here–in fact, some of the best friends I could possibly have. It’s amazing how quick and easy it is to get close to people from such different walks of life. But, we all have one thing in common–we left home to come here, for one reason or another.

And maybe that’s what brings us together.

I will miss you guys so much.

Love and Blessings,
Ava

Check it out…I’m soooooooooo excited. I will be going with two of my good friends in Daegu. =( Too bad Erin will be gone. But not only do we get to see a new city, we get to roll around in mud on the beach, drink, and sleep in a Korean Min Bak with 10 – 20 other people. Hahaha.

Supposedly, this mud is supposed to be very good for you.
2 more weeks and I’ll post up some pics. Bless! <3

…well, because I like it!

Words are power and no one can take that away from you. I wanted to teach English because of this. When so many things are a mess in the world, it’s hard to take action on all the sad things going on…but you can take action with words!!! Stand up and speak out…sometimes that’s all we can do, yet the most powerful.

And as much as I dislike many things America stands for, we are blessed that we can share our thoughts openly through words. Of course, there may still be some things that can’t be said, but other countries do not have that privilege as we do.

For me, it’s also a good way to sort my thoughts and calm down. There are so many things going on in my head that I just have to write. I’m not kidding. When I’m stressed at work I write letters to myself through email immediately. Hahaha. Kinda crazy but it helps me.

Until next time.
=)

Wow. I thought I would have time to write my daily writing (although it’s becoming less daily but this is a pretty loaded question. Maybe I am thinking about these questions too damn much.

It’s funny how you can hear a word and use it all the time but have such a difficult time defining it yourself–and I teach English.

I just think some people get confused between compassion and pity. Personally, I don’t think compassion involves pity–not real compassion anyway. “Pity” sounds so negative and it means that you “feel bad” for someone, which in turn makes them a victim and I don’t like that.

I think “pity” is just another way some try to make themselves feel better than others. Pity is just another form of judgement.

So now, how do I know if people have helped out of “pity” or “compassion”?

I guess I don’t know. I couldn’t be the one judge, either. But, I am thankful for all acts of compassion.

True compassion means you empathize whole-heartedly, with your mind, body, and soul. It means that another person’s pain and suffering makes you feel pain. It’s like the feeling that I got the moment where those two planes hit the World Trade Center and I was consumed with sadness and pain–not pity. I could feel (and although I know I never will truly feel it) their sorrow and pain. I think that’s compassion–given to each human as a gift. And sometimes we can literally help…and sometimes we just have to pray.

I am so sure I have been shown compassion many times throughout my life, but right now thoughts are flooding my mind. I can distinctly remember the kindness and compassion of strangers and others and I remember being so thankful. But, right now I cannot remember the situations. I am going to try to, but when I think about it that’s the way it goes huh? People won’t remember what you do…they will remember who you are. And although showing compassion is an action, the action may be forgotten but the person people remember never will. (I guess it can be argued that what you do is who you are, but that’s getting way too philosophical for a Friday afternoon, with one more class to teach;)

I am also thinking about times where I’ve shown compassion, but I won’t write about that. I can only write about the great experiences with people showing me compassion and hope that one day someone will remember me for it.

I just know that I am shown compassion everyday. I pray to our Creator who shows me it–and yup, He shows me it everyday.

Thank you.

can be pretty amusing. About 3 – 4 weeks ago, my boss had me start a composition class, which requires the kids to write. It has been a challenge teaching them about paragraphs, but most of them are doing great. I try to find topics that might interest them, and sometimes it doesn’t work too well, but mostly it has been good. I am correcting their papers and thought, for your entertainment pleasure, I’d share some responses. For some responses, I will just share a few sentences…

If I had two wishes I would wish for many money to fall because these days there is economic difficulties. Second, I would wish for school rivalries because school is boring.

Wait a minute..you have only two wishes and one is for school fights?!? You see how bad school is here? Oh, Korea, you’ve got to do something about this. But great job with the vocabulary kid.

If I had 2 wishes, I would wish for many cars and money. I would wish for knife, and ring and guns. I want to buy expensive watches and I don’t want to study. I wish to kill people. This is what I would wish for.

Okay, first of all, I said only two wishes. Second, should I be worried? Third, what if you killed people with many cars and money and rings? That would be efficient.

I’m just kidding. I do not condone violence and this kid was just trying to get a laugh out of me.;)

On a more serious note..I had the kids write about suicide. Korea has a high suicide rate and a few weeks ago the funeral was held in Seoul for the ex-president who jumped off a cliff due to money issues. A friend also told me that last week, two middle shool girls committed suicide together. Very distrubing. Anyway, here’s some responses.

There are many reasons people commit suicide. The most rason for suicide is study. Students must study but we don’t have rest time anymore. So the government should teach parents that students need rest and give notice to academies don’t teach on the weekend.

There are many reasons people commit suicide. Some people commit suicide because they are very stressful from school, work, and about money. Other people commit suicide because their families leave them. One way to help is to treat people with kindness and smile.

=) Sweet answer. If only…

I also had a kid who said people who commit suicide are stupid. He said he thinks they need to be more brave. Also, if they have money problems, they should find another job. He was the only kid who said something like that…very interesting.

I took a picture of a note one of my elementary students gave me. She is so adorable and has always been my favorite..ahem, I mean I don’t have favorites. I give them writing assignments and she did not do hers this week. She gave me the one due next week today, along with a note. It reads:

To: Ava teacher
Teacher hi!
I’m Sarah. I forgot before my writing assignment…I’m so sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. Probably teacher is angry. Teacher, here you are. This is my love. Teacher’s boyfriend is angry? Ha ha ha. I don’t like teacher’s angry face. Teacher smile.
From: Sarah

Muahaha. Until next time…bless! <3

I’m sure the word “powerful” can and will be interpreted in many ways. And I’m not even sure if this question is asking for events or one word answers (love, money, etc.) but since no one is here to correct my answer, I’ll answer the way I want to.

For me, being powerful is the feeling that I can do anything and everything I’ve ever dreamed of. It’s feeling independent and confident. It’s the feeling of standing right back up after falling flat on my ass.

One of these events would definitely be my father’s death. I’d hate to be depressing here, and I’m not. It was just a very difficult time in my life. I was 19 and watched him suffer so much. But my family was strong and we made it through. We always did.

After his death, I thought, “What else can I possibly go through in my life that will be as difficult as this?” And honestly, there hasn’t been a situation as difficult since. At the time I didn’t feel powerful, but as I grow older and look back, making it through that period of my life took strength, courage, and faith. I do feel powerful when I think about it now because I know that I will never be given anything more than I can handle and that I am strong.

Another event that made me feel powerful is graduating from college. As a freshman in high school, I (along with my friends and teachers) would have laughed at the idea of me becoming a teacher. I mean, I got kicked out of school my freshman year! My family never had a lot of money, so I always thought it wouldn’t work out. But things do work out and here I am. I ended up doing very well in college and graduated with a 3.7 GPA. And yes, that does make me feel powerful…but not because I think I’m better than anyone else because of my education. It is because I worked hard for what I wanted, and accomplished it.

And the last thing in my life which is turning out to make me feel powerful, is moving to Korea for a year. I feel confident that I can achieve what I want in life, I feel more confident about who I am, who I want to be and who I am not. I feel strong because I can wake up and overcome the obstacles of being in a foreign country and not everyone can do that. At times, I thought I couldn’t.

But so far, I think I’ve done a pretty good job.

Bless!

So, this is the topic for today, (according to my journal prompt paper.) Of course other questions seem more interesting, but I promised myself I would answer all of them and honestly.

So, honestly, I damaged a lot of stuff both accidentally and intentionally. It’s a pretty broad word–damaged. I’m not sure whether to take it more literally or figuratively but we’ll see where my mind takes me.

One thing that comes to mind is Waikiki Beach. When I was younger, my sister and I would get a kick out of damaging toursists floating devices at Waikiki Beach. I feel horrible, but at the time it was just so amusing. We’d swim under their floating mats, bite a hole in them or rip it with our nails and swim away. Then we’d watch as the deflated. I know…. terrible.

And there are many other stories of damaging property as a teenager…I distinctly remember a short lived infatuation with fire. We got in so much trouble starting fires at the park.
Looking back, I was a stupid kid! No really, my mom and dad should have given me more licken!!! Well, when I got caught…boy did I get it.

And then there’s other things I’ve damaged…other people’s feelings, relationships with people and even myself.

I don’t know if these were accidental or intentional, but nonetheless, I don’t think that matters. All that matters is you forgive, ask for forgiveness, live, and learn.

And I suppose this would be a great time…so to the tourists in Waikiki, and the firefighters in Pearl City…everything and everyone else I might have damaged…I’m sorry. Please forgive me.

Till next time…Bless <3